There were patterns in my Family Collective which healed as I became more embracing of my emotions, & stories I told myself. There used to be Villainizing & Blaming.
We were also scared & distant from dad vs mom. The last pattern I noticed was my mom being a victim & making dad the villain. That has shifted too.
I remember asking her what value dad brought to her & if she was happy in her marriage, she said yes. That shifted things. She was attached to the idea of getting me married to escape her own marriage. She has stopped forcing that idea now.
Lately patterns in my collective don’t stay for long. It’s been good to observe & shift them together as they come along.